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HOW TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AN AMERICAN AND A BRIT
1. If you tell an American your business is doing well he will hand you his business card and say we should get lunch. If you tell a Brit your business is doing well he will hate you.
2. The British admire a large vocabulary more than a large bank account.
3. A Brit has more respect for a man born on third base who ends up on first than a man who starts from nothing and hits a home run. In America, it’s the other way around.
4. If a Brit finds himself at an ATM in the pouring rain and his money gets completely soaked he will come up with a self deprecating anecdote to tell. If an American finds himself at an ATM in the pouring rain and his money gets soaked he will start a business selling ATM canopies.
5. If you tell a Brit he’s mispronounced something you will ruin his entire year. If you tell an American he’s mispronounced something he’ll think you’re pretentious.
6. The route to rising above your class in England is to be ‘privately educated’ and acquire the 'right accent.' The route to rising above your class in America is professional achievement and $
7. A Brit would give up his life savings in exchange for a knighthood. An American wouldn’t give up his life savings in exchange for anything
8. When tragedy strikes, Americans pray. Brits put the kettle on